North Nodaway held its school play Friday and Sunday with narrators Morgan Pope and Ellaina Renfro discussing 12 ways to survive a zombie apocalypse. A global emergency had been declared and society had broken down as an army of zombies had taken over. Christy (Katelyn Parman), Sam (Amy Richards), Susan (Elden Whipple), Jimmy (Addalea Barcus & Lacy Riley), Nana (Gannon Volner) and another girl (Casey Wray) all have to figure out on their own how to survive the zombies for as long as possible as the zombies (Olivia Renfro, Jackie Wray, and Alanis Wray) are constantly chasing them.
It was originally billed as ten ways, but the narrators came up with two more ways:
1 – Sacrifice the weak. As late as the Spanish Civil War, militaries left wounded victims behind to escape the enemy. One of Ernest Hemingway’s novels about that conflict features the hero of the story sacrificing himself to save his comrades at the end. But it was only a matter of time before the zombies, crying for brains, were on the prowl again.
2 – Trick the zombies. After all, they are brainless. But like (1), that could only work for so long.
3 – Overwhelming force. During the chase, Sam (Amy Richards) finds a secret stash of classified advanced weapons and blasts some zombies that were getting too close. But how lucky would one have to get? And what if one ran out of ammo and couldn’t find more stores?
4 – Join the zombies. It worked for two of the characters in the play. But like (1) and (2), that was a temporary solution.
5 – Raise a pack of GMO dogs. During the play, a pack of such dogs stopped a pack of zombies at one point. But we don’t have the ability and the know-how today, and even if we were working on it, how far along are we? And what about ethical considerations?
6. Kung fu. Useful if one is in a pinch. But what percent of the US population knows kung-fu, and would the zombies even care?
7. Reason with them. One of the girls is way ahead of the others and manages to talk some of them off the ledge. But zombies don’t have brains, so how could they listen to reason?
8. Romance. Susan managed to pull this one off, but the main problem is the same as (7). Zombies don’t have brains.
9. Run really fast. Works for a while. But what happens when one gets too tired?
10. Leave Earth. The problem is, we haven’t landed men on Mars yet, and we are just now planning to return to the Moon after 50 years. And what if the spaceship is too little to fit in?
11. Cannibalism. The problem is, it only buys time for a little while. And, as one of the teens reasoned, that would make humanity like the zombies.
12. Love. After all, if (1) only buys time and (11) makes us like the zombies, maybe the only slim chance is to not be like them.
At that point, the scenes got a little too dangerous for the narrators to continue, and they had to break off and return to the real world. Thankfully, we haven’t gotten to that point where zombies invade, everything breaks down, and everyone is on their own – yet.
Casey Wray was the stage manager. Danielle Riedel managed the sounds and lights. Mrs. Bix and Ms. Pedersen directed the play.
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