Opinion: Economic Alarm!

Early this morning, while trying to get a little much-needed sleep, I discovered I was spending more time getting up to shut off the storm alarm that I was in holding hands with Retha in my "save for a special occasion" fantasy dream. Seems like this poor alarm has gotten even less rest than I have over the last six months. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not complaining, because this electrical device is doing exactly what it was purchased to do. I just think we could both use a little less togetherness. This time, the alarm had interrupted my night to advise me that "a thunderstorm watch my be issued in three hours." THREE HOURS. Come on, people, call me again when it’s at the mailbox.
As I stumbled my way back to bed, I woke up early enough to realize that this three hour warning was a good thing if I needed to put up the cars and pets, close windows, or just check to make sure nothing was left out which may blow away. And again, it was doing what I bought it to do. After all, I most likely couldn’t find anyone else to stay up and protect me while I slept. The thought of this protection now racing through my head started me to think about how great it would be to have a similar device for financial protection. For lack of a better name, I’ll call it the "Watch Out Someone Has Their Hands on Your Wallet Warning Device." It would be programmable to cover your local gas station, your power supplier, cell phone, satellite and/or cable coverage, post office, general utilities (phone, water, trash pick-up, etc.), the tax assessor’s office, and any others who think they are empowered with a drain line to your funds just because they want more. Notice I said "want," not need. Any we who are trying to protect our funds should have the final say as to whether the need is justified. The warning device could have an on-line voting service. The really big red button would be for a NO vote.
To get your attention, the unit would emit a loud sound like the opening of a cash register and money being sucked out into an abyss. This abyss, of course, is owned by the aforementioned money suckers. But wait, maybe this is not the best way to go. With all these money suckers working twenty four seven to get their hands in our pockets, the poor alarm unit would: (A) Burn up the first day from overwork; (B) Make so much noise you would set fire to it; (C) Reveal just how many of these greedy types are out there and make us look forward to the tornado.
Good grief! Now, I’ll never get back to sleep.

Mickey Floyd
Sheridan West